After you read the 3 sample essays, please leave a COMMENT on this post responding to the following questions. Comments are due Friday, July 8 by the end of the day.
Note about the sample essays: The first two examples were NOT written for the specific prompt I am going to ask you to write on, but both are excellent examples of creative nonfiction written by real composition students at John Jay. The third essay IS in response to the prompt I will give you.
- What did you notice about each of the student examples?
- How did each writer structure their story?
- What choices did each writer make that you found compelling, interesting, attention-grabbing, emotionally-moving, or otherwise positive?
- What unusual or creative choices did they make?
- Which parts of the story gave you some kind of emotional reaction?
- What choices did the writer make in how they crafted their story that CAUSED that reaction in you?
1) something I noticed from each student examples was that they started with a story so the reader can get an idea of what they will talk about.
2) Each of the writers were really creative because I noticed in each of them they used dialogue in their writing and as a reader It kept the story Interesting.
3) The last example as a I was reading it, it made me feel empathetic because I know what is like to leave things for last minute thinking that an idea about the prompt would come to my head and then having to rush things last minute was also a thing I used to do a lot.
Things I took away from these essay samples:
– I noticed that they were all very descriptive. I myself, felt like I was the one going through their situations. All of them also started with an interesting hook/first paragraph.
– Their structures varied yet were all the same in a kind of way, with all of them having some kind of plot and really descriptive narratives.
– Choices that I noticed made by the authors that made me connected was the emotional side of things. The author with the sexuality conflict made me feel for her, made me feel proud when she was able to speak truthfully.
– Unusual/creative choices was the time sequences. They all wrote their essays in a organized matter in which they give readers a time and place in which everything happens.
– Parts of the stories that struck me emotionally was when they felt vulnerable or as if they do not belong because I have also felt that way before.
– My favorite one was “Lesbian”. The details in her emotions and the anxiety she felt was honestly heartbreaking. I can’t imagine feeling wrong for who I am, or my sexuality being used as something everyone disapproved of.
Reflection on Sample Essays:
– One thing I noticed from each story student was they had a good starter sentence in which gets the reader’s attention right away.
– Each structure of the essay was different yet also very catchy since when a reader sees an essay and the way its organizes makes the reader want to read it.
– The fact that each student uses different methods such as the “Lesbian” story includes thoughts and how she didn’t fit in because she was scared of her sexuality preference. I believe the student used great techniques to construct a well essay.
– The choices the students made was the act of including feelings, thoughts and the way the students use figurative language to make the topic of the essay more complex and meaningful.
– The parts of the story that gave a kind of emotional reaction was the way the students include the thoughts but more like a feeling in which I and students in general can relate like a “relief” feeling.
– The stories in all especially in the last one how I can relate a lot and others can too. The way when we are assigned something we have so much ideas and thoughts that in rare occasions we may be experimenting mixed emotions.
– something I noticed about each student’s examples were about being unsure but very descriptive about their feelings. It was almost building up to a conclusion.
-The thing that I found compelling was how much emotion was implemented in the writing. It didn’t feel like I was reading but more like the person was next to me sharing their thoughts.
– some creative choices were a change in the font i felt itr added more of a deeper meaning to it.
-the one that gave me an emotional reaction was “ lesbian” caues it was a big build up not being sure who they are yet and towards the end when she said “ yes , i am lesbian “ it felt powerful.
-the last story got me surprised cause of the way it was written it felt so relatable. The idea of writing about the struggles of writing the first essay and procrastinating flowed so smoothly and was such a bold idea that worked.
-Throughout reading these essay I notice that two of the essay started with a memory and the other started in present timing when he was writing this essay about him going blank.
-All the essay had a unique theme when writing there essay if its through growth, confidence, or even them writing about not knowing what to write about. But all of them had a way to grab the readers attention and make the story amusing which as a reader I found amazing.
-The one essay I found emotional was the “Lesbian” essay. Even though its not the same topic but I can relate to the sense of finding our confidence over time.
Lesbian : I noticed that she used MLA format. She had a beginning, middle, and end. She incorporated a reference that brought her story more to life. This reference showed how her belief changed. Her attitude towards sexuality changed due to her findings.
She referenced a real thing that inspired her to come out as her true self, and at the end reflected on how she changed. I found it interesting how she used James Baldwin as an example of what inspired her to come out, at least to allow herself to be okay with being who she is. It was creative how she went back in time and included those experiences. The fact that she had to hide her identity in order to not be seen as a disappointment kind of gave me an emotional reaction because it really sounds like it sucks and I wouldn’t want anyone to be in that position. The writer built up her story from her home to her childhood in school and the way she progressed the story made me feel like I was walking in her shoes so I really felt her pain.
Q : The writer very deeply describes the world around him and uses italics to show the switch into his inner thoughts. This was a very creative choice in my opinion. The breaks in their writing move the story along very well because it proceeds onto the next part of his journey. I like how the first page was like a prelude or context to better piece the story together giving like a beginning before the beginning. The way he described NYC struck me in an emotional way because a lot of people have this image painted in their minds of a stereotyped city full of lights and skyscrapers and business, but this writer included the dirty parts of it too. I appreciated the real truer image of the city. Comparing their experience in Chicago to Brooklyn and the city was very interesting because I’ve never heard of or seen that comparison before.
This I No Longer Believe : This writer structured their story in the order of their thought process as the days passed, leading up to the point where they looked back on their choices pertaining to completing the essay. I found it creative how at the end they included the “hard lesson” they learned. I got an emotional reaction when they brought up not liking some of the prompts you have to write about because I very much agree! I connected with the writer at this moment because it’s hard to write a good paper when the prompt is either unrelatable or something you’re not interested in. It was an unusual paper since the prompt was about something you no longer believe in and the writing wasn’t very set on a certain topic like religion or the death penalty etc. However I found it very positive in the end realizing the whole thing seemed like it was no longer believing in procrastinating and putting off work that seems easy but chances are it isn’t, according to the writer.
– Some discovered on each of the student’s example was they had good hooks starters to grab the reader’s attention.
– One write used the past to structure their story more likely to explain in detail their point “Lesbian”. The next writer use some dialogue to paint a more vivid picture of the person talking, I also saw some metaphor while reading this essay that I liked “Q”. Lastly, the last person use some imagery to give the readers some vivid image of what was happening “This I No Longer Believe”.
– Some choices the writer made that I found interesting were the use of metaphor to define their feelings in the moment; It made me more intrigued to their story. The other writer opening page was like a guide for the readers, I somehow liked how he introduced that part to his essay. The story telling for “Lesbian” was a good way to write this essay in my opinion, I feel like how she told her story time by time gave the readers that good look to her life and development of her discovery.
-I can’t say I found an unusual choices to write their essays, other then “This I No Longer Believe” the topic of the essay was really unanticipated and ended up being distinguished.
– The part that gave me the sense of emotional reaction would have to be “Lesbian” it was a good essay that gave us a story of someone in discovery.
-The choice that the writers made in how they crafted their story that caused my reaction to me was determining the setting, made memorable moments reflect on their story, I understood the thesis and stay on topic till the end, and recreated natural dialogue.
1. I noticed that all of the sample essay were written with lots of emotion. With the amount of details they wrote on their essays you could easily see a picture or get and idea on what was going on.
2. I Feel like all the writers used imagery to structure their essays since you can get a good picture of what was going on in each essay.
3. What made the essays so attention-grabbing was how they hooked you in the beggining then gave a very detailed discription on what they were going through in the story. Thier essay had gotton lots of imagery thanks to the amount of details they had put in their essays.
4. In Essay 1 Q, the author talked about where he used to live and the major diffrences between where he used to live and New York which felt very creative to me.
5. The 3rd Essay related to me a little with how the author watches some anime and shows since i tend to do that to think of something to write.
6. The author made choices that related to my experiences by stating ” This paper is purely based on me and my experiences, which in theory should be the easiest topic to write about.” When it sometimes isn’t easy to come up with something to write about
– Something I noticed in all sample essays was that they were written from the heart. As a writer when you write from the heart, you give the audience a clear picture of everything that’s being described.
– Every writer gave a clear description of everything that was going on. They used imagery and dialogue to keep the story interesting.
– Something that made these essays attention grabbing were their thesis statement (hook) which kept me interested and wanting to read more. These essays were very descriptive and gave lots of details and information in which it allowed me to create a picture in my head.
– The I no longer believe I can do this essay stuck out to me the most because it gave lots of details and imagery about how they struggled to get the essay done. In fact, I related to this essay the most because it is something I would do myself.
– some parts of the third essay gave me emotional reaction because everything they did is everything I do when I am struggling to write an essay and I tell myself this will be easy.
– In the third essay the author uses understatement to convince himself he has an easy essay to get done and procrastinates his way into getting it done the night before it is due.
I notice that the students would describe their experience. Each student that wrote their essay really wrote it out of their soul.
The writers used a lot of figurative language including imagery.
I love how they used imagery to attract our attention and make the story interesting.
When they spoke about their emotion’s and explained how this affected them.